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She’s here! An Open Letter to Our Daughter

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She’s here!, originally uploaded by Kate Chan.

Dear Sweet Zoe,

As I write this I am waiting to hear the date/time of your flight to us. I’m so overwhelmed by the tons of emotions – excitement, anxiety, joy, elation, relief, concern for you and your foster mom, gratitude for Carol who will be escorting you, confusion about what lies ahead of us as a family, and an unbelievable amount of love. I also have thoughts racing around in my head that make me wonder about your trip, your thoughts, your losses, your needs and what you will ask about these days when you are older and we talk together. Oh, life is a wondrous and glorious thing. It is something that will amaze you and give you joy. It is something that challenges us all through it’s ups and downs, but remains is some strange way, consistent with love and light.

Your dad and I dreamed of you for years before this process ever began. There was never a moment in our partnership that we didn’t talk about adopting when we could. You were never an afterthought, not a result of what could not have been; but rather you have always been exactly what we hope for – what COULD BE! You have been you. In that basic sense, the basic tenets of agreeing as a soul to become who you are in this lifetime is all that we have ever hoped. You. As you are. Nothing more, nothing less.

We talked for weeks, months and even years about what name you would have. We didn’t worry about the name – we wanted a name that would fit you. When we chose the name Zoe, it was as though there was no longer a need for discussion or debate. It was you. We were satisfied. So why did we chose Zoe?

Zoe means life.
It is the beginning of all things.
Even though we come in to life alone, we do not do so by ourselves.
YOU are loved by the many people who have been touched by your life.
The washing of our lives upon the shores and over the shoulders and backs of each other is what makes us who we are.
Life is like the waves on the ocean.
They begin beyond our vision and never cease.
Some days they rise high over our heads
and some days they gently rock and splash at our toes.
We as humanity gather together at the shore for play, for sustenance and in moments of awe.
We share in the gifts of life together.
We celebrate, we mourn, we learn and we grow.
We ride out the waves as they are given to us.
We are altered by the movements of the ocean around us and molded by not only the waves, but our reactions to them.
Life is beautiful.

Some people may think that we have named you Zoe because you are the gift of life in to our lives.
But really, you are so much more than that.

You are the gift of life, not for us,
but rather from your wonderful, strong birth mother.
She gave you strength and courage.
She gave you the chance to live and seize the moments of Life around you.
She granted you the dreams and the possibilities.
She knows the beauty of Life.
She knows the beauty of You.

And then those dreams and possibilities were supported and nurtured by your omma.
She cared for you as you learned about our world and comfort.
She rocked you, sang to you, danced with you,
watched you crawling, heard you laughing and comforted you.
Your omma knows the beauty of Life.
She knows the beauty of You.

And your Dad and I?
We wish to give those dreams wings.
We wish to give you the music of life.
We wish to carry on with you like waves on an ocean.
Another pair to love Life and You.
To support your dreams and Life.
We know the beauty of Life.
We know the beauty of You.

And that is why we chose to name you Zoe.
The name means Life.
It is You.
And we are honored to know and love You.

Welcome Home, Little Girl.
With all our hearts, we love you so –
-Your Mom & Dad